We're redesigning Funny Tweeter. Your feedback is always welcome. Talk to us at @funTweeters
@KeetPotato: me: [waiting in line at the bank]
other bank robber: "keith just go to the front"
@smudger103: This is so me 😂😂
@stephenjmolloy: Magician: *pulls a rabbit out of a hat and makes doves appear from a handkerchief*
Zookeeper: And the penguin in your backpack. Hand it over.
@AbbieEvansXO: Drug dealer: if you're a cop, you have to tell me
Me: [into shoulder radio] is that true
@SoundOfSaad: My bank account status is more scary than the Conjuring!
@TheMichaelRock: Coworker: What's your phone number?
*looks up from phone*
Me: I don't have a phone.
*looks down at phone*