@Brampersandon_: ME (watching a sea of a million llamas stampede over the horizon): dear God, it's the alpacalypse
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@abbycohenwl: I never thought I'd meet the man of my dreams while I was out running errands in sweat pants with no make-up on. And I was right
@lawrence_bear: Apparently sleeping your way to the top, doesn't mean dozing off in meetings or taking naps in the copier room.
@RexHuppke: When the priest says "Body of Christ" I say "Thanks, I've been working out." Then I grab the cracker and run back to my seat.