@Brewsker: You can literally say "the night is young" at any time of day or night. Nobody is policing this.

@leontymccarthy: I always hold the door for ladies, but they never seem to get in the car when I do that.

@jonnysun: ad for jk rowling's fantastic beasts and where to find them: wat if harry poter was pokemon

@wickedsuga: When I get startled, I scream in a really deep voice instead of my normal one. Cause if I'm going to be freaked out, you should be too.

@darinlovesbacon: Some woman at my office just said Star Trek when we were all talking about Star Wars and now our IT guy is refusing to fix her computer.