@ChrisThayerSays: me when I see my crush
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@Jeff_G_Nixon: 3yr old: [whispering] I have a secret "What it is, sweetie?" 3: [shouting] I POOPED! "Do you know what a secret is?" 3: [whispering] no.
@AndyAsAdjective: [checks Facebook & sees my 4th grade girlfriend has liked my hot chocolate recipe share] ME: I knew she'd come crawling back to me one day
@ValeeGrrl: Husband got excited thinking I was touching myself under the covers but I was actually just opening a Kit Kat I didn't wanna share.