@JustHadOneJob: Meanwhile in Ireland.
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@TheSharona06: Today seems like a good day to wash my hair and take 10 selfies wearing 10 different shirts so I can pretend I look human on a regular basis
@SenatorBigfoot: Alright, alright. You can all have jet packs! [two days later] Reporter: Another 8000 dead today due to sky rage.
@JJSummertime: Now I lay me down to rest. I pray your TC loves you best. If he does choose another, I sincerely hope it's not your mother.
@Iwriteforcats: I'm gonna leave this world just like I came in, dawg! "Yo, for sure. Kickin and screamin!" Nah, brah. On a giant spaceship.