@_youhadonejob1: Meanwhile in Thailand.
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@lovemydogduck: During the day I don't believe in ghosts, But at night I'm a little bit more open minded
@joeljeffrey: [Eating] Waiter: How's the meal? Me: I dunno. Let me check *pulls out phone Me: Not good. It only got 2 likes on Instagram Waiter: ...
@GaryJanetti: I just found out five people I went to high school with are dead. What's taking the rest of them so long?
@swiftenhaal: Carp we hit an iceberg! What am I herring? This scampi true! Whale I squid you not Oh cod I can't die Waterboat me? You're so shellfish Fin