@AbrasiveGhost: ME:[defending myself] Oh yeah?? Well I got 5 words for you buddy: please be nice to me
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@JohnLyonTweets: Aquarium managers: This is now a completely smoke-free facility. Puffer fish: Dammit.
@TheAlexNevil: This lasagna recipe has been handed down in my family for generations in the hopes that someone would eventually make it.
@cray_at_home_ma: There are actually only two stages of parenthood: having children, and having children who can reach things on countertops.
@M3lissaMcDonald: I just spent the last four hours connecting all of my watches together to make a belt. Complete waist of time.