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@senderblock23: Men In Black Men #AddaWordRuinaMovie
@jenstatsky: FUN THING TO WRITE ON A POST CARD: "Weather is great, having tons of fun! Are you still planning to murder your mailman?"
@Ideal_Victoria: My boyfriend just texted me, “We need to talk.” I think he’s going to propose!
@Home_Halfway: Rap videos are completely unrealistic. Nobody has that many friends
@Brianhopecomedy: Went on a trampoline with my 1 year old and learned that if you jump JUST right it unfortunately turns into a baby catapult.
@TheCatWhisprer: Can't believe how divided we've become over an election. It's not like it's the color of a dress or something.