@cupcakelynda: Microsoft Word just suggested that I change "you're" to "you is" so yes, I am very very afraid of what the future of education holds.
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@jake_lach: Dog ate raw chicken so I called the vet to see what I could do He asked what I think they eat in the wild. Basically, he called me an idiot
@Scorpio1080: Black Friday: Because Only in America, People trample others for Sales the day after being thankful for what they already have
@Rollinintheseat: [High school reunion] Person: "Are you wearing the same clothes you wore on our last day of school?" Me: "You told me to never change."
@FreckleMcPickle: Been married so long it's almost like a first date. Husband is always wondering if he's even gonna make it to 1st base.