@DimpleThakkar: Million dollar idea: an alarm clock that plays Nickelback if you hit snooze.
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@Shelts99: I may have hit rock bottom, but the upside of being down here, is I can see up all of your skirts. As you were.
@Tmoney68: As the fridge door was about to shut, I grabbed pizza & barely got my arm out before it closed. *Legally changes name to Indiana Jones*
@DanMentos: judge: I hereby sentence you to 68 years in prison my lawyer: your honor my client respectfully requests a year be added to his sentence