@samdunsiger: Millions of years of evolution have moulded us into a species that struggles to open the wrong ends of garbage bags.
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@HansGrubertron: GYM INSTRUCTOR: ...and over here are the free weights. ME: *shoving weights in my pockets* Fantastic.
@Juicedballs: *Takes out phone & plays Cindi Lauper's True Colors as you reach for the last slice of pizza without asking*