@ABurgerADay: Minnesota is my favorite state that sounds like it's a small soft drink.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Moldy_Jellybean: I haven't had a good nights sleep since I started wondering what holds up those blocks in Mario.
@david8hughes: Me: kids, your mother & I are in a gang now. There's room for 2 more members Son: but there's 3 of us Me [petting both our dogs]: 3 what?
@dreamthievin: Give me a break, ouija board. I don't need to know who was killed in this house. Just tell me how the murderer got away with it.
@blakeshelton: I'm so drunk right now I just walked into Canadian customs and shouted "Why y'all checkin' me?! Ur the ones with a pot leaf on your flag!!"