@iscoff: Mirror mirror on the floor, who's the worst at home decor?
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@AngelaEhh: I thought I wanted to get married again. Then I laughed and remembered why I shouldn't think.
@Humor_Fetish: "Do you want to be the numerator or the denominator tonight...? You're so radical!" How I hit on my imaginary mathematician girlfriend
@Mr_Kapowski: Even if you're single, always blame a declined credit card on your fictional spouse at the register.