@bourgeoisalien: Misery loves company. But not you. Even Misery has standards.
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@tamytoo2: Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me:I'm cute? Cop: Nope Me: you like my car? Cop: Nope Me: I could do this all day.
@Dirty_Naomi: I sleep with a knife under my bed in case I can't open my midnight snacks. It also comes in handy if people try to steal them.