@BisleyT: Mispronouncing words is kind of my forty
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@rachelle_mandik: the person who wrote the program that estimates how much time is left on a software update did not take their job seriously at all
@EndhooS: Where are you going? "Ice fishing" You know you can just buy ice at the store right? "No I mean th..." Or just freeze some water even...
@dubstep4dads: "Interested in mail enhancement?" Me: u mean 'male' enhancement "No. [whispering] what if I told u I could get ur mail like so fast bro"
@reesespiece_: Funny how whenever I ask someone how a girl I knew is doing, the first thing they say is "married."nLike that's gonna stop me!