@robfee: Mitt Romney announcing he’s not running for president is like Johnny Depp announcing there won’t be a sequel to Mortdecai.
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@ErrenMichaels: You threw. Our tea. In the harbour. And then you changed the spelling of harbour. We do not. Forget.
@caseytduncan: The worst part about getting kidnapped would be when the news told everyone your real height and weight.
@TOMayorFord: Daylight Saving Time starts this evening, turn your clocks forward and change smoke alarm batteries before going to bed tonight.
@SCbchbum: Teens don't know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.