@robfee: Mitt Romney announcing he’s not running for president is like Johnny Depp announcing there won’t be a sequel to Mortdecai.
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@GensPlace: Somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a note on my windscreen which said, 'Parking Fine.' That was nice...
@WildeThingy: It's not that I think I'm out of your league. Its more that I'm not even sure we're playing the same sport.
@QwertyJones3: Whenever I tell her that I want to put my Butterfinger into her MilkyWay, she Snickers.
@oakhillbargrill: That tweet is awesome. You guys are awesome. Twitter is awesome. I've made awesome friends on Twitter. A thesaurus would be awesome.