@OneFunnyMummy: Mo' money mo' problems might be true, but I'd still like to find out for myself.
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@ehdannyboy: I woke up to my wife fluttering her eyelashes at me. I said, "Ok, what do you want?" She said, "I want you to turn the ceiling fan down."
@GensPlace: Online dating has its good points. You can choose your own name, lie through your teeth and you can't smell their breath.
@horsedetective: Horse detective stood in the rain and looked out to sea. He thought about justice and fate. He thought about her. He thought about apples.
@bingowings14: My dad always used to say 'if you take care of the small things, the big things take care of themselves'. This cost him his job at the zoo.