@2tickytacky: Mom made me take Millie to the prom. With her dark hair and big, brown eyes, I didn't argue. Horseshoes can sure wreck a gymnasium floor.
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@s8n: If it's 1 or 1000 sins you're still getting sent to Hell. So why not go for 1,000,000 sins and come down here a legend
@Dawn_M_: My doctor said the claw marks on my face are not from a poltergeist but I should stop trying to put roller skates on cats.
@carlyken: "I'd like one personal pizza please" Pizza: Your life's a mess. You should lose 10 pounds. Call your mother. "Whoa maybe not that personal"