@baconacid: Mom u can stop cutting the crust off my bread now im in a gang
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@That_Damn_Duck: I’m beginning to think that for some of you, the wheels on your bus do not go round & round.
@joe_binkley: (Standing next to pool with a golf club and horse) Friends: Are you sure you've played water polo before?
@phxguy88: A Facebook friend posted 8 pictures of himself fixing a lawnmower, so I drove over and shot him. It just felt like the right thing to do.