@novicefather: "Money isn't everything," I say, poorly.
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@Naked_Wombat: Hey terrorists, wanna cripple America? Hack Twitter and cause all DM's to go public. I'm just kidding, don't do that shit. We'd kill you.
@SondraDeeMe: Roasted beef is like regular beef except the cows family tells embarrassing stories about it, which are tough and tasteless.
@wendchymes: I saw a woman using a pay phone today and that probably means she's from the future & trying to blend in but she got the year wrong, right?