@TheTweetOfGod: Most homophobes are secretly gay. However, most arachnophobes are not secretly spiders.
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@CatherineLMK: "I'm $50 away from getting free shipping which is only $5 and what I want is $12 so I need to spend $38 more to save money." -my brain
@jazmasta: *ex GF pulls up to drive thru where I work* "Big mac please" "Would u like LIES with that?!" *my boss dragging me away* "LIES, LUCY.. LIES!"