@Underchilde: Most household injuries are caused by saying “whatever” during an argument.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ZachXJ: Little kid next to me on a plane just ate the preservative packet out of his jerky, looked at me and said, "Don't tell my mom."
@MonSwanson: I can't wait for my grandma to ask me repeatedly why I don't have a boyfriend "because I'm such a pretty girl". I'm a psycho, grandma.
@TheCatWhisprer: Can't believe how divided we've become over an election. It's not like it's the color of a dress or something.