@just1fool: Most of my life consists of trying to keep up with what's not cool so I can be sure to avoid any small talk.
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@PJTLynch: Sure, I could live a pious life so St. Peter lets me through the Pearly Gates. Or I could just crawl under the gate since IT SITS ON A CLOUD
@LurkAtHomeMom: Marriage Tip: If your husband is watching golf, show him you're interested by repeatedly asking "why doesn't our lawn ever look that nice?"
@Steelers1972: My friend has canceled our lunch plans three days in a row. I'm starting to think she really doesn't like lunch.
@specialsquid: "Hi, my name is Gary and I'm a shopaholic, my favorite place to shop is the alcohol store."