@shariv67: Most women desire someone who makes them laugh and also feel safe, so basically a clown ninja.
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@UnFitz: Wildflowers are just regular flowers that go clubbing until 4 a.m. and snort coke off of each other's tramp stamps.
@VinnyPisciotta1: Good is the enemy of great. Sponge is the enemy of math. Metaphysics is the enemy of Walmart.
@TheToddWilliams: Wife: I'm glad you're watching TLC and looking to improve yourself. So who are your new friends? Husband: These would be your Sister Wives