@AristotlesNZ: Movies are so unrealistic. This guy's using his computer to access an alien ship & not once has it asked if he wants to upgrade his Adobe.
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@TheMichaelRock: It's difficult to be romantic when your dog always eats the trail of McNuggets leading to the bedroom.
@xLiserx: People who buy copious amounts of everything before a blizzard: Is there nothing in your house every other day of the year?
@tararose711: My 3yo's bedtime stories include: "Three-Hour Run-On Sentence," followed by, "Ask For a Drink 500 Times," and finally, "You Skipped a Page."