@TheAlexNevil: Movies Lesson #5: very few people die while trying to get from one hotel room to another using the ledge outside, so give it a shot.
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@jackiembouvier: Thanks, baby Jesus, for helping me get that new job instead of helping millions of children find water and food. I know it was a tough call.
@thejakeshenry: I was pretty excited about this box of elbows before I saw that it was only macaroni.
@thejessbess: This guy at speed dating asked if I have any weird tattoos I was like lol not if you love The Golden Girls.