@KateWhineHall: My 4yo just shut the bathroom door on me while I was inside and told me I was in jail. So I locked the door. I love this game.
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@SortaBad: "Brian did you remove some of the thread from your shirt logo?" Me: [clearly enjoying people calling me the Hug Boss] what? No probably not
@jazmasta: [kids party] "This bouncy castle is twice the price of last year" Dad no "That's.." Please no dad "..Inflation for you" *kids start crying*
@kimtopher22: Optimism [op-tuh-miz-uh m] noun Brushing your teeth before bed, knowing damn well you have a 1/2 sleeve of Thin Mints on your nightstand.