@KateWhineHall: My 4yo just shut the bathroom door on me while I was inside and told me I was in jail. So I locked the door. I love this game.
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@AndyAsAdjective: I now feel I've watched enough reruns of The Shawshank Redemption on basic cable that I'll be able to successfully make it in prison.
@ElitatheLibra: Miles: Mom what does clitoral damage mean? Me: 😳 Use it in a sentence, baby Miles: Like clitoral damage in a war? Me: Co-lat-er-ul, babe
@AimeeHelene1: *picks out all the marshmallows from your Lucky Charms* *replaces them with Flintstones vitamins* You looked a little sickly.
@badbanana: Hundreds of creepy clowns terrorizing people across multiple states. On the bright side, they can all be picked up in one police car.