@wallin_monica: My 5y/o just threw a 15 min fit because she doesn't want me to get old. I had to tell her if she took a bath it would help me stay young
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@Rhythms_n_Booze: HR: You know why we called you down? Me:Hm. Promotion? HR: You know we monitor internet usage right? Me: I'd like to reporting a hacking.
@the_mom_dot_com: I just got laid. But don't worry, I was totally thinking about you guys the whole time.