@ElKnuckelhombre: My 7 yr. old thought it would be really funny to hold up a sign in the back window of the car that said "HELP ME!". It was not.
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@WilliamAder: Just in case the FBI turns on my web cam, I've got a teeny tiny picture of Jimmy Hoffa taped to the lens.
@JohnLyonTweets: House arrest? Your Honor, if anyone is going to be punished here it should be me. My house has done nothing wrong.
@awkwardphilippe: [creating humans] God: They will have a powerful immune system Assistant: Boring God: ok some will die from eating a peanut A: Nice, nice