@carlyken: My 8 told me he likes Skillrex because it sounds like what Transformers would sound like if they quit saving the world and formed a band.
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@withanewname: *beep TSA: here try again *beep TSA: here try again *beep TSA: here try again ME: WTF? TSA: Sorry dude it was my watch. Here's your pants.
@SteveSuckington: Why does Jehovah need so many witnesses? Sounds like a pretty shady dude to me.
@GoodZiIIa: [after getting pulled over] cop: are you registered me: i don't vote cop: i meant the car me: no it doesn't vote either
@jctwritesstuff: Me: It's late. Go to sleep. Brain: K. Me: Brain: Me: *kinda dozing off* Brain: WHY WOULD HORSES EVEN TRY TO PUT AN EGG BACK TOGETHER?