@Sims_was_here: My alphabet soup is full of typos. Go home Campbells; you're drunk
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@robfee: Everyone in horror movies: *Loud scream* It was probably just the wind. *Ghost flies across room* Just the wind. *Dog gets cut in half* Wind
@iwearaonesie: *helps wife get toddler in his high chair* wife: That's a new shirt, let's put a bib on you me [wearing a bib] This is ridiculous
@LurkAtHomeMom: *Mary Poppins voice* Ok, children! Time to go! [15 min later] *Batman voice* I said let's go.
@Nikkeya08: I tried playing dead to see how my 6 yr old would react... turns out if i die he'll poke me and go down stairs and eat chips...