@TheToddWilliams: My anchor tattoo is so realistic I can't get out of the bathtub.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@davidkenny100: Pal: On your date, go to a French restaurant. And remember! Girls love a wine connoisseur. Later... Me: we'll both have the wine connoisseur
@AaronFullerton: 1938: "It's a bird!" "It's a plane!" "It's... Superman!" 2013: "Is that a drone?" "Yeah, it's probably a drone."
@PastorBate: Dear diary, Sometimes it just seems like I can't tell if something is an inanimate object or a person My therapist: Yes that's quite clear