@shkeeber: My bank has informed me that Twitter followers can not be used as collateral for a car loan. You guys are useless.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@DaveWeasel: If your new boyfriend carved your initials into a tree on your first date, let the fact he brought a knife be a sign of things to come.
@pungodly: Apparently "I don't like scary movies," is not an appropriate response to being asked to watch a wedding video.