@Ahm76: My beef with you is that you're too chicken to pork me.
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@mindintheshadow: My ex is looking for a job but I don't think satan is retiring anytime soon so I suppose she'll be unemployed for a while.
@PlatinumShower: I just used "volumizing" shampoo for the first time.... Everything sounds the same.
@tacos_y_cerveza: If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth the $20
@Not_From_Troy: I did a survey and asked 5 women what kind of clothing brand they preferred. The 5 responded: "How the hell did you get into my house?"