@Ahm76: My beef with you is that you're too chicken to pork me.
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@Mr_Kapowski: New Coworker: So do you have any kids? Me: Yeah, one too many New Coworker: Haha, oh yeah? How many do you have? Me: One
@jonnysun: *full moon emerges from behimd clouds* nno--nonono it cant be…RUN. FAR AWAY FROM ME. NOW. IM A-- IM A-- *turns into bungalow* IM A WAREHOUSE
@errdayhustlah: My kid sat on the floor of a public restroom, so I had to throw him away and now I have to make a new one. Parenting is hard, you guys.