@ObscureGent: My best dating advice is to wait after you have two kids and a house before you tell her you speak elvish.
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@Dank_Pal: Ocean's Eleven? Ummmm I'm pretty sure it's a little older than that. Who is this idiot?
@jenlaw_11: Mom I'm running away! No I don't need a jacket! Mom no I'm fine I don't need a jac- mom! No I don't need you to pick me up later mom! MOM!
@PinkCamoTO: Hey, boy. Are you a Swiss army knife? Because you're a smaller, less effective version of everything I need.
@ArfMeasures: COP: So what happened? ME: He stole my watch & ran away down the road COP: Can you describe it? ME: It's like a big path that cars drive on