@ObscureGent: My best dating advice is to wait after you have two kids and a house before you tell her you speak elvish.
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@aneesa_p: Shout out to authentic Indian restaurants that encourage eating using only the hands. They don't give a fork.
@bea_ker: [circus school] "So to tame the lion, you have this whip..." What if the lion's too close? [picking up tiny stool] "we've thought of that"
@amydillon: My son just demanded to be changed into different pajamas for breakfast. Thanks, royal baby.