@DanOverHere: My boss asked me for a brief word. I said "underpants?" and we laughed and laughed and I'm clearing out my desk.
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@faisaladam_: In Soviet Russia a bar walks into men. The case of the man-killing-bar remains unsolved.
@DamienFahey: I just dropped my phone in the toilet and for a second I stood over it and thought, "That's where it belongs."