@nettie0918: My boss just informed me its unprofessional to tell customers congratulations when they call in to change last name due to divorce.
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@KKAlThani: I thought I was listening to a Maroon 5 song on the radio when I realized that the radio is off and I need to have my brakes changed.
@Mikecanrant: *Pauses Titanic during the most romantic part* *Turns to GF* "You know, Contra was really easy. But I still liked using the 100 life code"
@li4mst3w4rt: alcohol is never the answer, unless the question is, "why were you barely conscious on the kitchen floor eating dog food?"