@browneyegirl9: My boyfriend asked for a dirty pic last night, I was able to get my whole kitchen in the shot. That should last him a while! He's so weird.
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@awkwardphilippe: That awkward moment when your date says she has a hair piece but later you find out she was saying herpes.
@Lindzeta: Didn't u hate it when as a kid u got the "mystery flavor" lollipop & the mystery ended up being that your parents got divorced (Or lemon)?
@daemonic3: HIM: Happy birthday, honey! I got you a gift basket, just like you wanted HER: Oh thanks! What's in it? HIM: What do you mean, "in it"?
@UncleDuke1969: Me: What are my choices again? Pollster: Donald Trump… Me: Or? Pollster: Puppymonkeybaby. Me: … Pollster: Well? Me: I’m thinking.