@i_Lean: My boyfriend calls me "babe" because "pig in the city" is such a mouthful to say.
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@Amburglar_: I hate when I'm getting a back rub & he stops 3 mins in & says "my thumbs hurt." It's not like I ever say "My jaw hurts." I finish the job.
@WilliamAder: While I fully intended to "sleep my way to the top," it appears I've napped my way to the middle.
@noog: [aliens talking] "They call it a sel-fee" A photograph of oneself? "Sometimes several" But why? "We have one theory" Go on "They're idiots"