@Goldishocks: My boyfriend is so cute I decided to get another.
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@Brianhopecomedy: *bakes 12 cookies* *waits for family to come home* *eats 12* *family arrives* 5 year old: "I SMELL COOKIES!" "Weird! Here's a salad."
@krissywillbretz: A good way to get kicked out of church is to shout "HOLE!" after every chorus of "Glory, Glory, Glory".
@Darlainky: Establish your dominance with the drive-thru attendant by saying, "That completes my order" before they ask.