@OkieGirl405: My boyfriend is taking me to a Spanish restaurant for dinner, I'm kind of scared, I don't speak Spanish, how will I know not to order dog
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@WilliamAder: While I fully intended to "sleep my way to the top," it appears I've napped my way to the middle.
@hstweetheart: Ariel: "But I love him, daddy!" *sobs as King Tritan rips her iPhone away and unfollows PrinceEric69*
@PortRooster: Buddy of mine dropped some acid... Burnt a hole in the floor... He was tripping for days!
@TravLeBlanc: A long time ago, I learned the importance of just being myself. I think the world would be a better place if everyone would just be myself.