@Ideal_Victoria: My boyfriend just texted me, “We need to talk.” I think he’s going to propose!
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@didifalldown: [God Creating] Lucifer: Make them wake up paralyzed sometimes G: That sounds horrible L: People will love it G: Hm, I trusted you on spiders
@torrami: Dragons aren't evil; they're just upset that they can't enjoy Popsicles and other frozen treats.
@pleatedjeans: [couple tossing baby back and forth] [music stops] judge: custody granted dad: [holding baby] AW DAMMIT