@HaleyMDriscoll: My boyfriend said we could only get one cat. So I'm only getting one cat. One pregnant cat.
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@Weird_Rash: Just got arrested for racing my Segway wearing an adult diaper and a Viking helmet. Still not clear which law I broke.
@thejessbess: I'm no scientist, but I don't think it's possible for EVERYBODY to be kung fu fighting.
@nedostup: Every woman says she wants to be treated like a princess, until you try to marry her off to your most powerful ally.