@curlymalloy: My boyfriend wakes me up when he wants to have sex... Do I wake him up when I want to buy shoes???... No!!!
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@jenniferfralic: Everyone at my funeral gets a stun gun. The last person standing gets all my stuff.
@ShesARealGenius: ME: Brad's here HUSBAND: Brad who needs space or Brad who's paranoid about being murdered? BRAD: OMG u 2 are smothering me ME: I've no idea
@aimlessamers: English, if I ran it: A group of geese is called a "group" A group of buffalo is called a "group" A group of catfish is called a "group"