@suzieQ0007: My Canadian 4yo just told me he wants to be Captain America if anyone wants to take a traitor off my hands.
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@Carbosly: Gluten-free, low salt, no sugar all-natural whole grain bread? The only thing "natural" about this product is the urge to get away from it.
@PajamaStew: Through a telescope, I see a woman on a planet light years away. She waves. I wave. I awkwardly realize she is waving to the guy behind me.
@BallsMcBallski: The seventh rule of Fight Club is no one leaves until ALL the chairs are put away.
@OtherDanOBrien: [Computer has become self-aware] Scientist 1: Shit, just like in Terminator Computer: I HAVE WRITTEN SOME POETRY Scientist 2: No, worse