@WilliamAder: My cat didn't get me a Father's Day card and things are a little tense around here right now.
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@murrman5: [spending entire date hiding the fact I'm really a beaver] "ow" what's wrong? "I got a splinter" may I see? "I guess so" delicious "pardon?"
@AngelaEhh: It's that time of year again, to reflect and remember how much I love my tax deductions. Kids... I meant my kids.
@MrMildSauce: It's not working. I've napped every day this week at work and not a single raise or promotion. Sleeping my way to the top was a stupid idea.