@_davidlucas_: My cat jumped off me unexpectedly, so I get it, Europe. I get it.
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@gogglepossum: [2 monkeys in a bath] Monkey 1: OOOHH OOHH AHH AHHH AHAH!! Monkey 2: If it's too hot Colin, put some cold water in
@LuvPug: Ugh, stalkers are horrible. You'd think SOMEONE could've let me know I was out of toilet paper.
@iscoff: *draws a tarot card* Ah, the guy with too many swords. This card means you need to have less swords
@Jennifergr8: Women dressed head to toe in animal print just bumped into me, thought I was being attacked my an obese leopard.