@Laser_Cat: My cat knocked my phone into the toilet so now I have to shop for a new cat.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@lisaxy424: *phone rings* Meh, if it's so important, they'll leave a message. *voicemail notification* Meh, if it's so important, they'll text.
@OctopusCavemann: Wolfman: *Drinks a Coors Light* Noooooo! Me: OMG you’re dying because Coors Light is called The Silver Bullet? Wolfman: No this beer is just gross.