@Bob_Janke: My cat sat up from a dead sleep and stared, frantic toward the empty basement laundry room so I guess I'll be buying a new house now.
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@HonestToddler: They’re saying I put a stuffed animal in the toilet. Untrue. I sent it on a mission to retrieve my toy cars.
@IncrediblyRich: If Bob The Builder's slogan is "Can he fix it?" then he's not really a builder is he? More of a repairman.
@iwearaonesie: wife: as immature as you are, you do do a lot for this family, so thank you me: *giggles* wife: me: wife: ...go ahead me: "do do"
@stephenjmolloy: Me: "Stay back! I'm an expert when it comes to karate!" *mugger approaches* Me: "Karate is a martial art developed on the Ryukyu Islands."