@ahhhpatrick: My Christian mingle username is: GAY4GOD hit me up, looking for love
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@ZombieProblms: Do zombies go to heaven when they die? I hope so. There's lots of nice people up there to eat.
@Poutymcgee: The cat licks itself and it's cute. I do it and I'm "no longer allowed in the library".
@TheMichaelRock: Our laundry room flooded because an apple chunk clogged the washer hose. Go ahead, have kids. They have pocket apples.
@thegayfarmerguy: The wind blew a smart car into my lane and I had to roll down my window and swat it out of the way.